Tales from the Kiddie Table
by morrigans
Summary: Shenanigans, misadventures, and snapshots of the daily lives of the "X-children"-Xavier Institute's underclassmen. All the New Recruits & some older X-Men will appear eventually! Each chapter is a separate oneshot unless otherwise noted. Most of them are humor for now, but that might change.
1. Outlet

Ermagerd New Mutants fic

Honestly, for such super cute characters, they didn't get enough screen time, so these are just more ridiculous shit I could imagine themselves getting into. They're mostly dumb cartoon humor oneshots for now, but considering how emotionally invested I am in these minor characters, I could get into some introspective stuff.

Jubilee and Rahne are included, so I guess these take place around season 2? (An alternate universe where it's always the beginning of season 2 and nothing bad really happens, like the worst thing that could happen is one of the kids pissing off Logan)

All author notes/commentary will be at the end of the chapter from Chapter/Oneshot 2 onwards.

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the show.

* * *

**Outlet**

It's Wolverine. The thing about Wolverine is that you don't say no to Wolverine. Ray wonders if he acts scary on purpose or if it just happens naturally. He's not sure which one is worse.

Anyway, Logan grins. "You don't mind, do ya, kid?" It's not so much a question as a command, as he tosses Ray the plug. Ray generates a current in his hand, enough for the TV to pop on to some sports channel.

He hears voices coming down the hall.

"Man, I hope the microwave in the kitchen works," comes Kurt's voice.

"We're blacked out, stupid," Kitty shoots back. "I doubt _anything_ works."

"Wait. Do you hear that?"

"Omigod, is that the TV?"

Ray suppresses a groan and he's _just_ about to turn to Logan and say, hey, wouldn't you be more comfortable in the living room, let's move there, when Kitty and Kurt walk in, each holding an armload of microwaveable snacks. All in the space of a second they glance at each other, and then at Ray, and then they _beam_ at him.

Kurt claps him hard on the shoulder. "Heeey Ray, how ya doin'?" he asks. "You hungry? Want some popcorn?"

Kitty "plugs" the microwave's power cord into Ray's other hand. Then she and Kurt argue over popcorn flavors. Ray doesn't get a word in edgewise.

"The power would go out while I'm showering." Amara, wet-haired and bathrobe-clad, stalks into the kitchen, personally offended by the power outage. "Where's-oh, there you are, Ray."

"Uh-" He holds up the two plugs he's already got but Amara interrupts him: "Just for five minutes." And she jams the hair dryer plug between his teeth.

Ray makes a muffled undignified sound. Logan chuckles.

"I'll be out of your hair soon, I promise," Amara promises, but Amara has a lot of hair.

On the bright side, Ray never knew he could use his powers through his mouth.

On the down side, he can't turn the page of the book he's reading (or at least he doesn't want to risk zapping a school textbook). So instead he thinks about how he's going to make them pay him back for this (except Logan, who'd probably put him in a cold ditch for even suggesting it).

Then Roberto walks in, cradling a radio. He looks at Ray and snorts. "Well, at least your power's good for _something,"_ he says.

Ray glares at him. It's probably ineffectual because of the hair dryer plugged into his mouth.

"Speaking of which, I need some help. Logan hijacked the TV-"

"Excuse me?" growls Logan.

"I mean he _rightfully_ took the TV because it's his right, but anyway, there's a really big soccer game going on and I seriously-"

Ray makes more muffled undignified sounds.

"Oh yeah…" Roberto says. He fiddles with the radio plug thoughtfully, and then leers. "I'm sure we can find _somewhere_ to stick it."

Stunned, Ray overloads the plugs.

**Fin**

* * *

Is this logically plausible? Who knows. Apply cartoon logic! The image of Ray as a human (mutant) outlet came to me at one in the morning a few months ago and struck me as amusing. I hope someone else out there thinks so too.


	2. Piggyback

**Piggyback**

"C'mon, guys," Sam calls. Someone yells back, but he has no idea who it is or what they said.

He sighs. They would be running late on the day of a big test.

"I'm gonna leave," he says after a moment. "Sorry, but I can't be late again and-"

"Wait, Sam!" A door flies open and a disheveled Ray tumbles out. "You gotta give me a lift."

"What?" Sam doesn't drive. Unless-

"No way! Sam, remember you owe me one from the last training session?" Roberto emerges from his room and looks at Sam very intently.

"Hey, I asked first!" yells Ray.

"Guys-"

Sam should've ran then, or cannonballed himself out, because Ray and Roberto race towards him. They end up tackling him at the same time-Roberto's arm latching onto his shoulders, one of Ray's long legs hooking around his waist-wrestling each other and nearly toppling Sam over.

"Hey, let go!" Sam yells, trying to throw them off. "I'm not a _taxi!"_

Then Ray's knee shocks Sam on the rear. Sam yelps, and suddenly, with only a blast for warning, he takes off.

He launches down the hallway and out the door, Ray and Roberto still hanging onto him.

Going at God-knows-how-many-miles an hour, it's a miracle he remembers where the school is. Vaguely, through the rush of wind, he hears someone whooping, then someone else yelling at them to shut the hell up. Sam reminds himself to never do this again.

They land right in front of the school, in the bushes. If Sam thought flying with two people clinging to his back was painful, crash-landing is worse. Branches prick him in the face as he finds himself suddenly inexplicably tangled with his friends.

"Ow! Your elbow's in my-_gah!"_

"Your foot-"

"Get off my _arm-"_

Principal Kelly towers over the teenagers thrashing in the shrubbery.

"What are you three doing out here?" he glares. "Don't you have first period?"

Sam sits up (on Roberto's leg). "Uh-"

"No, I don't want to hear it. Just save it for-for your own private spaces. Now get to class. And I'm not writing any passes, so get there on time." He turns brusquely on his heels and walks back inside.

"Save what?" Sam asks, finally getting his leg out from under Ray.

"With _you?"_ Roberto glares at Ray. "As if!" Ray shoves him.

Sam grabs them both by the collar and drags them into the building.

**Fin**

* * *

Gay threeway at Bayville High! _Whaaaaat_

Again, this just came to me as an amusing image.

Warning: I'm super fond of Roberto and Ray because they're both studs-[deep sigh]-and I wish the writers had gone through with their ongoing rivalry so we could see them squabbling in the background all the time

So I'm gonna write it into my fics

_All of my fics_


	3. Magazines

Warning: This one's kinda long. Also, I had actually written the first two chapters months ago, so the style of this one (it's much more recent) is a little different.

Also, it's still boys doing dumb things.

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the show.

* * *

**Magazines**

Bobby found the magazines in Logan's room.

(Along with a mini-fridge stocked with beer, an impressive collection of cowboy hats, and a large bag of corn chips that had mysteriously disappeared from the kitchen two weeks ago, sparking fights amongst the kids over who must've stolen it.)

He'd opened a drawer at random, hoping to find something cool - something from S.H.I.E.L.D., maybe, or memorabilia from Wolverine's shadowy past. Instead, the airbrushed face of a woman grinned out at him from under some shirts. Bobby frowned. He pushed the flannels aside, and then he saw the woman's nipples.

"Oh wow," he said.

It wasn't like he'd never seen a naked girl before. They'd done three hurried days of sex ed in school, and he'd looked up Those Kinds of websites with Sam and Ray like any other teenager.

But there was a certain excitement in finding these magazines. The pages were faded and the clothing-the very few articles of clothing he saw-looked weird. Bobby checked the dates on the cover; they were from a time when kids didn't have the internet and probably had to steal magazines like these from their fathers. Which was more or less what Bobby was doing now. There was also a perverse thrill knowing that Logan, his teacher, his sometimes-idol and most-times-terrorizer, got _his_ perverse thrill from these.

He dug out the rest of them from their ineffective hiding spot. He wasn't _stealing_, really, not in the sense that he was going to keep them, but like any other teenage boy, he just _had_ to show them to his friends.

* * *

"Oh man, her tits are bigger than my head," said Ray.

"Why are they so pointy though?" Sam asked.

"It's the bras they wore back then," Roberto told him.

"If you think those are scary," Bobby said, "check _these_ out."

He flipped the page.

"Wow," said Sam.

Roberto uttered something in Portuguese.

"There's a line between sexy and scary," said Ray. "That's it. That's the line."

Bobby grinned like an older brother corrupting his younger siblings. (Even though it had been Sam showing them the bookmarked sites he'd found on his father's browser that first time.)

"I like this one more," said Sam, picking up one of the first magazines. "They're all wearing clothes - well, kinda, but there's still somethin' really… indecent about 'em."

"You mean the fact that they're all either see-through or look like they've been painted on?" Roberto asked, raising an eyebrow.

Sam shrugged sheepishly. "Something like that."

"Jeez, how many of these are there?" Ray asked, sifting through the pile.

"I dunno," said Bobby. "Not that many?" Some of them were just single, ripped-out pages. He shrugged. "I just grabbed the ones on top. I think he had more."

"Just sitting in a drawer under his clothes?"

"Yeah!" Bobby laughed. "I don't think he tried very hard to hide them."

"'Cause he figures any X-kid with half a functioning brain won't be stupid enough to sneak into his room and look through his things," said Roberto, with some disdain.

"Aw, lay off, sunshine," Ray sneered. "If it wasn't for Bobby, we'd be watching bad daytime TV right now instead of looking at _this."_ He opened a magazine at random to a two-page spread of a woman with both her legs behind her head.

"What were you doing in Logan's room, anyway?" asked Sam.

Bobby shrugged. "I was bored." The other three stared at him incredulously. "I didn't wanna watch bad daytime TV!"

"Y'know this just proves my point, right?" said Roberto. "That you probably don't have even half a functioning brain?"

"Aaaw, like you've never done dumb stuff when you were bored!"

"I mean, I _have_, I never said I haven't-"

"Can you do _this,_ mister model student?" Ray stuck his magazine in Roberto's face. It was a picture of two women twisting in impossible positions.

Roberto shoved it away. "I'm not even gonna dignify that with an answer."

"Are you embarrassed that you _can,_ or embarrassed that you _can't?"_

"Why are you so interested in whether I can lick my own ass?"

"'Cause no one else around here is gonna kiss it for you, so…"

"Guys, don't fight in our room," said Sam, coming between the two of them. "I just cleaned it yesterday."

He looked serious. The bedroom, they now noticed, was cleaner than it had been in weeks.

"Yeah," Bobby said with a sheepish laugh, "he worked so hard."

They all gave him a look. Anyone in the mansion, no matter how badly they clashed over everything else, would agree that Bobby Drake was a slob. Even Bobby Drake himself, at some point, would acknowledge that fact.

"Alright, alright." Roberto backed down first - but not before shooting Ray one last dirty look.

"And Bobby, 'Berto's right!" Sam said to the other boy. "When Mr. Logan finds out you've been snooping through his room, we'll be lookin' for the pieces of your body buried all over the grounds."

Bobby laughed. "Jeez, melodramatic much?"

Roberto turned to the window. "Hey, you guys hear that?"

"I'm serious!" Sam insisted, oblivious to both Roberto and the noise coming from outside.

"Aw, don't worry, Sam," said Bobby. "I'll put 'em back later."

"It's Logan!" Roberto suddenly yelped. "Logan's home!"

"I'm going to put 'em back _right now,"_ Bobby said in a panic, jumping to his feet.

He swept the magazines into a haphazard pile-which fell apart immediately when he tried to pick it up. Loose pages scattered all over the floor, slipping under beds and desks. Bobby cursed extravagantly. He dropped to his knees to pick them up; Sam and Roberto followed suit. Ray opened the door and stuck his head out.

"Is he coming?" Sam asked.

"I dunno, I can't hear anything from downstairs," said Ray. "This place is too fuckin' big." He stepped out into the hallway, frantically turning his head from side to side.

"He's gotta be heading here," said Roberto. "His room's just around the corner from this one."

"Crap! Don't remind me," said Bobby.

"Oh shit, I hear someone," Ray said. "Did you guys get 'em all? Hurry up!"

"Here!" Roberto shoved one last clipping into Bobby's hands. Ray threw the door wide open for them to scramble out.

"He's coming up the stairs," he hissed.

"He'll be here any second," Bobby whispered. "I'm gonna make a run for it. You guys distract him!"

"What?!" said Ray and Roberto at the same time, but Bobby was already sprinting down the hallway.

"Wait, Bobby! You dropped one!" Sam scooped up the clipping and dashed after him.

Roberto stared with his mouth open like a fish. Ray shrugged wildly.

Bobby turned the corner, Sam hot on his heels, just as Logan arrived on the second floor. He stopped as he noticed the two boys standing out in the hallway. He raised an eyebrow.

"Can I help you with something?" he asked.

"Um…"

"Uh-"

"Did-did you have a good trip, Professor Logan?" Roberto ventured. Ray tried very hard not to cringe.

Logan only raised his eyebrow higher. Answering with a grunt, he kept on walking.

The boys traded panicked looks. _What do we do?_ Ray mouthed. Roberto opened his mouth and then closed it again. He wasn't great at thinking under pressure. Not that he ever froze up during fights, because in fighting it was just-

He got it.

Roberto pulled back his arm and punched Ray full on in the jaw.

"Oww! What the _fuck!"_ Ray yelled.

Logan turned back around. "Hey!" he barked, "what's going on?"

It was too late. They were all-out brawling: throwing punches and dodging them, Roberto trying to tackle Ray, Ray trying to zap Roberto in the face. A stray bolt of electricity narrowly missed Logan's shoulder.

"Hey!" he shouted again. _"Knock it off!"_

He grabbed Roberto roughly by the arm; Ray by the collar. He glowered until they were still.

"Now I don't know what you guys were fighting about," Logan growled, "and I don't care. But if you got something to hash out, you do it in the Danger Room. _Not_ in the hallways!"

Panting, the boys exchanged a look.

"In fact, since you two are so eager to get your hands on each other, I'm gonna have a special training session just for you. Just to blow off some steam." Logan smiled. "Report to the danger room tomorrow morning. Five a.m., sharp."

He looked up suddenly, sniffing. "You too, Drake, Guthrie!" he called. "What, you think I wouldn't smell you?"

**Fin**

* * *

Lol jk I'm super fond of all the New Mutants boys, 'cause if they're not studs they're super adorable and stupid (I couldn't find a way to make Jamie fit into this one but I'm super fond of him too)

I also love the lady New Recruits so don't worry I'll write about them eventually!

I'm just super fond of Evo-verse New Mutants, it's a problem


	4. Laser Tag

**Laser Tag**

Jubilee burst into the rec room, where Ray was lounging on the couch and Amara curled up in the armchair, a pile of books spread out on the table between them. She jumped onto the table with a flourish, right in an empty spot between a binder and a Barron's prep book.

"Guess what I heard Logan and Ms. Munroe doing!" she announced excitedly.

Ray looked at her idly. "Hooking up?" he suggested.

Jubilee made a face. "Ewww! No! Keep guessing!"

Amara looked up from her textbook with a huff. "Jubilee, please, just get it out already. Some of us have a geometry test to study for."

"They were planning tomorrow morning's danger room session," Jubilee told them, "and guess wh-"

_"Jubilee!"_

"Laser tag!" she cheered. "We're playing laser tag tomorrow!"

The words were like magic. Ray tossed his notebook into the air with a whoop, "Hell fuckin' yeah!" and for maybe the first time ever, Amara didn't wrinkle her nose at his colorful language. Instead, she broke out into a wide grin. "Laser tag?" she asked, wide-eyed with hope. "Really?"

"Yeah!" said Jubilee, doing a small jump.

Ray threw his pencil in the air as well, and zapped it before it came down.

"I am _so_ psyched, you guys," Jubilee gushed. "I've been getting _flattened_ in training sessions lately, but I am _always_ good at laser tag."

"We all are," said Amara. "Before I came here, I never thought I'd be good hitting people long range with lava missiles."

"Now you're one of the best," said Ray, nudging her in the arm. "And I'm gonna get Bobby back for icing me in the face yesterday," he swore.

"Ugh, I know exactly what you mean," Jubilee said. "Rahne almost tore out my hair last week."

"We'll get 'em back." Ray held out a fist and Jubilee bumped her knuckles against his.

Amara closed her book, with almost a hint of sadness. "I'm too excited to study now," she said.

* * *

"Alright, listen up," said Logan, "today we're doin' laser tag."

Jubilee nudged Amara in the arm. They'd been trying not to smile the whole morning.

"We've been through the rules and objectives already, so I won't bore you for too long," Logan went on, "but there _is_ gonna be a slight change."

He dumped open the large bag he'd been carrying on his shoulder. A bunch of toy guns and a couple of bulky vests tumbled out.

"We're playing… regular laser tag?" Sam asked.

"Something like that," said Logan. "Alright, vests are for Magma, Jubilee, and Berzerker. Everyone else, grab a gun."

"Wait! Are we not 'it'?" asked Jubilee, slightly panicked. "We're always 'it.'"

Their teacher shrugged. "Yeah, but then I figured you guys aren't learning anything about _dodging_ projectiles and those guys aren't learning anything about aiming and firing them."

Their teammates certainly looked eager to learn. Jamie made a surprisingly menacing twelve-year-old with an orange plastic gun.

"Hey Jubes, remember that time you blew up your fireworks in my face?" he asked. "'Cause I do."

Jubilee backed up a little-right into Amara, who was backing away from a dangerously smiling Rahne. "Wait a minute, Professor Logan, I don't think regular laser tag works like this either!"

Logan pretended not to hear. "Okay, everybody ready?" he called. "On my mark-ready, set, _go!"_

**Fin**

* * *

Don't worry, Amara passes that geometry test.

I was reading a summary of "Growing Pains" and they described Amara, Jubilee, and Ray starting some kind of "mutant laser tag" after Tabby throws one of her little bombs at them, so that's where I got this. Oh, also that episode when they had a "snowball" fight that was mostly FIRE AND ELECTRICITY BOLTS AND PLASMA BURSTS like what even

Which one of them do you think lasted the longest?


	5. Late Night Snack

Thank you for all the kind reviews! [blows kisses] As well as the faves and follows and even deciding just to check these dumb stories out. I'm so glad people actually like them.

* * *

**Late Night Snack**

Amara would've been in the shower longer, if Roberto hadn't insisted _very loudly_ that if he didn't shower right now, he'd miss a soccer game that was going to be on TV in half an hour.

"Why don't you just shower _after_ the game?" Amara had suggested, but there was no reasoning with him. The boy could be quite pigheaded sometimes.

Down in the kitchen, four Jamies sat at the table reading four different books. The first dupe - the original Jamie, Amara assumed - was eating chocolate pudding.

"Is that the last one?" she asked.

Jamie nodded, not looking up from his book. It was a textbook; he must have been cramming for tests again. Ororo wouldn't like that. But Amara figured he was going to end up doing it in a few years anyway, like all the other teenagers in the mansion.

She checked the refrigerator just in case there was a cup of pudding Jamie hadn't noticed, and was disappointed to find that he was right. She couldn't be mad at him, though. Pudding had been for everybody and no one had any special claim to it. Unlike Bobby and his "infinite dibs" on the sour cream and onion chips. Amara grabbed the bag anyway.

There was no such thing as a quiet night at the Institute. Noise came from every room Amara passed by on the way to her own. Kitty, Kurt, and Scott cheered excitedly at something on the living room TV. Rahne chased Sam around the foyer, Jubilee watching them and laughing. Bobby and Ray were holed up in Bobby's room. Amara didn't want to know what they were blowing up tonight. On the bright side, she wouldn't have to hear Ray blasting music from his room right next door to hers.

A pile of books waited for Amara on her nightstand, a few of them for fun but most of them for school. She sat back and picked out the one on top. She might as well try and make a dent in her reading list while it was... relatively quieter in the mansion.

A cracking sound came from outside, like a branch or a twig.

Amara sat up. She sat absolutely still, listening intently.

_Just an animal,_ she finally told herself.

Leaves rustled, seemingly right by her window. The curtains were drawn; Amara had no idea what it could be.

_A squirrel,_ she thought, _a pigeon, an owl, a mouse or - or a raccoon._ Jamie once insisted he was going to adopt a raccoon he found by the garage, when Professor Logan reminded him of the mansion's no-pets policy. Amara tried to remember how cute the animal had been in daylight.

Then she told herself she was being ridiculous. She curled her hand into a fist and lit it into magma briefly. Amara Aquilla was called Magma for a reason, and she would not be afraid of a few nighttime noises.

Settling back, she turned her attention to _A Tale of Two Cities._

"Psst."

She sat up.

That wasn't a normal nighttime noise.

She looked towards the door, but it definitely came from outside.

"Pssst!"

_And all I wanted was a nice quiet night,_ Amara thought.

Something tapped on the window.

Amara swore, if this was some dumb prank, she would burn Bobby or whoever it was in the last places they'd ever want to be burned. If it was the Brotherhood Boys, she would roast them alive.

She put down her book and turned her hand into a blazing flame again. "Who's there?" she called.

No answer.

_Now_ they decided to be silent.

Fiery hand raised in front of her, Amara tiptoed to the window. With her other hand, she flung back the curtain.

_"Boo!"_ yelled Tabitha Smith.

Amara jumped back, screeching in a most undignified manner. A jet of fire blasted from her hand unbidden, scorching the ceiling.

Tabby cracked up; Amara could hear her through the window. Perched precariously on a thick branch right in front of Amara's window, she laughed so hard she almost fell off.

"Tabitha!" Amara scolded. She heaved the window open. "That wasn't funny!"

"Yes it was," Tabby gasped between laughing. Calming down long enough to look at Amara's glare, she amended, "Okay, it wasn't. Sorry, I just had to."

Amara sighed, putting her hands on her hips. To be honest, she shouldn't have expected anything less from her best friend.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"What, I can't come over to see my best buddy?" Tabby grinned broadly.

"Not like this you shouldn't," Amara said.

"This way was more fun."

"Maybe for you!"

"Come on, doesn't this feel like an exciting secret midnight rendezvous?"

"It's eight p.m.," said Amara.

Tabby leaned back against the trunk of the tree, not a care in the world. "Well, I was just hangin' out at loser central when I thought - aah! Whoa!"

A wind picked up, lifting Tabby out of the tree. Amara stuck her head outside to see the elegant figure of Ororo Munroe, standing on the lawn right under Amara's window.

"I can't help but be reminded," her teacher said drily, "of _Romeo and Juliet."_

"I don't think this happened in _Romeo and Juliet,"_ Tabby cracked nervously.

Ororo's winds carried Tabby gently to the ground. "You know you are always welcome back here, Tabitha," Ororo said, "through the front door, of course." Frowning slightly, she plucked a leaf lodged in Tabby's hair.

Tabby shrugged, slightly restrained in the presence of the windrider. "Sneaking in's more fun. And I didn't even trip any alarms, so I guess I'm still doing pretty good without those danger room sessions." Ororo raised an eyebrow, but couldn't help smiling.

"But what are you doing here, Tabitha?" Amara called down.

"I told you, I just wanted to come over and say hi!" she shrugged. "And also ask if you wanted to grab a burger. I'll bring her back before ten," she added with a smile to Ororo.

"Before nine-thirty," Ororo corrected.

Tabitha gave her a snappy salute. "Yes ma'am!"

"But I've already had dinner! I don't think I can eat another whole burger," Amara said. Then she had a thought. "Wait." She smiled. "Can we go to that place that sells little bowls of pudding?"

**Fin**

* * *

...Can you tell I ship them


	6. Snowmen

**Snowmen**

A big snowstorm had visited Bayville the previous night, covering the town in a thick blanket of white - thick enough to warrant a school closing. The resident weather witch of the Xavier Institute claimed to have nothing to do with it, despite the bemoaning of certain mutant teens that they needed more time to study for a test that day.

And despite _that,_ they all slept in.

Any training room sessions were pushed back on days off, since there was no rush to get to school afterwards. Logan came downstairs to a perfectly quiet dining room at eight. He nodded good morning to Ororo, Hank, and Xavier, who were sitting at the table, sipping coffee and reading the news. Heading over to the counter to pour himself a cup, something caught Logan's eye. A snowman, coming up probably to his shoulder, smiled at him with pebble teeth.

He raised an amused eyebrow. "Who's been busy?" he asked.

Ororo smiled. "Little Jamie. He was up before I was, already rolling snow piles." Looking closely, Logan noticed four other snowmen across the backyard.

"Works fast for a little kid," he remarked. They were neat, too.

"You should see him in action," Hank said. Logan followed him out to the foyer. Through the wide front windows, he saw about ten dupes working on ten more snowmen. They were all slightly different: a wider smile, a stick for a nose instead of a stone, or extra tree branch arms.

"Not bad, huh?" asked Hank.

"Hmm," was all Logan said, but on the inside he was deeply impressed.

"Admire while it lasts," Hank sighed. Logan gave him a questioning look; the other man shrugged. "Soon the others will be awake, and they'll probably be wanting a snowball fight."

"Ah, I'm sure he'll able to pick up the pieces afterwards," Logan said. "He's workin' pretty hard."

Hank looked at him. "Have you ever _seen_ Amara, Jubilee, and Ray have a 'snowball fight'?"

"...Oh." Those three. Logan once kept a record of all the mutant-power-related damages that the mansion suffered in a month. About ninety percent were caused by those three.

"I once tried telling them that a snowball fight usually involves actual snow," Hank said, "as opposed to lava, electricity, and plasmoids. Their farfetched solution was to invite Bobby, and, well… you know Bobby."

The other ten percent of damages were all ice-related.

Logan took a sip of his coffee. "You don't suppose we could… make sure they don't wake up this morning? Just for today?"

Hank opened his mouth to answer. He was promptly interrupted by a loud cheer from upstairs: _"Snow! Whoooo-hooo!"_

"I think it's too late for that," he said.

* * *

Jamie came in around eleven after his twentieth snowman, at Hank's insistence that he needed to rest up and have something to drink. The kid was a sucker for hot chocolate. He didn't notice Ray, Jubilee, and Amara bounding out of the mansion all wrapped up in their winter clothes, or at least he didn't pick up on what it would mean.

By lunch time, he found out.

"Awww, hey! My snowmen!" Jamie wailed from the front step.

"Oops," said Jubilee, emerging from behind a smoldering stump of a former snowman.

"Ohhh, I'm sorry, Jamie," said Amara, and she really did look like the sorriest of them. "We tried not to hit them, but I guess we got carried away."

"But hey, they died honorable deaths," Ray said, as if that was supposed to be comforting. "They made great shields." Jubilee elbowed him.

"It's alright. I guess I can make some more later." Jamie kicked despondently at a chunk of snow. Then, with the slightest hint of puppy dog eyes, he looked up at them. "Hey, can I join you guys?"

Ray looked at Amara, who looked at Jubilee, who shrugged. "Sure," she said. They owed it to him for destroying hours of his hard work.

"Really?" Jamie beamed. He jumped up, punching the air. "All right!"

With some effort, he split himself into twenty dupes.

The other three stared, confused. And by the time they understood, it was too late. Each dupe had packed himself a decent-sized snowball, and without warning, they launched their attack.

There was no escaping them. Jubilee and Amara both got hit twice before figuring out how they could retaliate. Ray tripped over a snow stump and was bombarded mercilessly in his vulnerable position.

Logan watched them from the front window, smiling.

**Fin**

* * *

Thinking about it, Multiple's powers could be _useful as hell._

Jubilee/Ray/Amara is like my laser tag brot3, running around terrorizing everyone, which is really stupid, because they only had that one scene where they were talking together, what is my brain


	7. Swimsuit

**Swimsuit**

Jubilee stared into the mirror. Her reflection stared stubbornly back. She stuck out her tongue petulantly at the same time Jubilee did.

Rahne looked at her, both annoyed and concerned. "Have ye gone mad?" she asked.

"Maybe," Jubilee lamented. She couldn't even find it in herself to be offended at the comment. "I still can't figure out what's wrong."

"That's because _nothing's_ wrong, Jubes. Stop worrying! You look fine," Rahne insisted.

Jubilee and her reflection frowned. She didn't _feel_ like she looked fine. She kept turning, trying to see herself from every possible angle. "I got this three weeks ago," she said. "Do you think it's too late to return it?"

"What?! Why?"

"I'm having second thoughts, I think. I don't know." She really didn't. The bikini fit fine. It was a standard two-piece, with a top that tied around the neck and a bottom that fit just perfectly just over her hips. It didn't make anything look particularly _un_flattering, but something about it just felt… _off._ "Maybe blue isn't my color," she speculated.

Rahne huffed impatiently. "_Any_ color is your color," she said, and it would have been flattering if not for her exasperated tone. "Now will ye come on? The pool will get too crowded if we wait any longer."

Jubilee shrugged. Probably not, she thought. She wasn't the only girl in the mansion having second thoughts about her bathing suit. Amara insisted the halter neck on her new one made her shoulders look too wide. Kitty just threw on an oversized t-shirt and her gym shorts before heading out, and even Jean seemed to look in the mirror without her usual self-assurance.

Jubilee glanced back discreetly at her friend and roommate, who was putting on last touches of sunscreen on her legs. Rahne's swimsuit was old - worn out and a little bit out of style, but she clearly wasn't bothered by it. Jubilee envied her for that. Not that Rahne _had_ anything to be worried about, of course; she was in great shape, as usual, and threadbare or not, the old green two-piece suited her well.

Probably sensing that Jubilee was watching her, Rahne came up to the mirror and made faces behind her friend's shoulder. Jubilee swatted her away.

"It's me, isn't it?" she finally said.

"Yes," said Rahne flatly. "Your negative attitude about a perfectly fine bathing suit." She poked her friend in the stomach.

"No! It's because I'm so pale." Jubilee stretched out her arm under the sunlight pouring from the window. Her skin practically gleamed. "God, I'm like a vampire or something."

Rahne rolled her eyes. "Pfft. Don't be ridiculous. Summer just started! Everyone's still pale from the winter."

Jubilee cocked an eyebrow. "Everyone except you." Despite the blistering heat, it was only June. And despite that, Rahne already had a nice tan going.

"Because I _go outside_ instead of standing around in my room all day worrying about whether or not I look horrible when I _clearly_ don't," Rahne said firmly.

"That's because you don't look horrible. I do."

"You don't."

"Stop lying."

"I'm not lying!" Rahne hit her arm, lightly. "I couldn't pull off blue to save my life."

"I'm _so_ not pulling this off."

"Jubilee, _please._ It's perfect."

It was starting to remind her of scrubs. _God,_ why hadn't she noticed how off this was in the dressing room of the store? "I should've bought the floral print one," she told Rahne.

Rahne's eyes widened. "What, that horrible pink-and-black thing at the mall?"

"It was cute!" Jubilee put her hands on her hips indignantly.

"Oh please," Rahne scoffed. "That one looked terrible on you. Actually, it would've looked awful on anybody."

"But maybe it wouldn't have made my hip bones look like they stick out," said Jubilee.

"Well, they don't," said Rahne. "And for what it's worth, I wish I had your figure."

"No you don't. You have some semblance of curves," Jubilee said enviously.

"You're very graceful, though."

Jubilee smiled. "Aww, that's kinda sweet!"

Rahne scoffed again. "What, saying something that's obviously true? You'd have to be as graceful as you are after years of gymnastics."

The smile dropped. "Wow, and I thought you were trying to be nice."

"I'm telling the truth, which is even better. And I am _extremely _nice, waiting here for my flaky roommate while she stares at herself in the mirror for hours on end." Rahne flopped onto her bed dramatically, bouncing a few times on the bedspread.

"Don't make it sound like that." Jubilee cocked her hip to one side. It was _starting_ to look a little better… unless Rahne's prattling was just distracting her.

"I could be outside," Rahne bemoaned, "splashing in cool water, lying on the grass while the sun warms me up…"

"Showing off for Roberto?" Jubilee cracked.

Rahne threw a pillow at her head. "Shut up."

As Jubilee ducked, the pillow bounced off the bookcase and onto the floor. "Y'know, I'm starting to think I'm not made for triangle tops," she remarked, going back to her reflection. Rahne groaned. "I look like a ten-year-old."

"I'm starting to think I'm going to cry," Rahne said. she sat up and looked at Jubilee very intently. "Alright, listen to me. From the very bottom of my heart, Jubilee, you look gorgeous. I promise."

"I look like a stick-figure ten-year-old," said Jubilee.

Rahne stood up. "Well, I suppose if ye don't trust me, I could get one of the boys up here…"

"Oh _ick!_ Our Institute boys?"

Rahne slowly moved towards the door. "Aw, don't be like that. I'm sure Bobby would love to tell ye that blue is your color."

Jubilee's eyes widened, then narrowed. "You wouldn't."

"I'm sure it wouldn't take long," Rahne went on innocently, standing in the doorframe now. "I saw him just outside, sitting in that ridiculous kiddie pool of his."

"Raaaaahne…"

"I mean, he'd probably tell ye later anyway. So why not speed it along and use it to get ye out of your room sooner?" Rahne edged out of the room.

"I swear to god, Rahne, I'll blow your face off." Sparks danced on Jubilee's fingertips.

Rahne only grinned. "Don't worry, Jubilee, I'll be right back. With Bobby!" With that, she sprinted out of the room.

"That's it!"

Jubilee ran out after her, launching her fireworks. Rahne dodged them easily, laughing as she changed into wolf form without even missing a step. She bounded down the steps much faster as a wolf. "Get back here!" Jubilee yelled, a laugh bubbling up from her throat despite herself.

She chased Rahne all through the mansion, out the back door, and right into the pool.

**Fin**

* * *

I don't really know where this one was going, honestly; I just wanted a break from boys doing dumb things. I also feel like I fell into some bad girlie cliches in this one? (Like the whole griping-in-front-of-the-mirror-to-your-friend thing.) But idk, this is what my brain gave me. My favorite thing after writing dumb boys is lady friendships.


	8. Kiddie Pool

Much quicker update than usual, because this one takes place on the same day as 'Swimsuit.' (...Wait, is that even a logical reason for a quick update?)

* * *

**Kiddie Pool**

By nine a.m. that morning, the temperature outside had soared to 98 degrees. Half the residents of the Xavier Institute rejoiced, the other half lamented - but everyone rushed to the pool as if their lives depended on it. Only two people stayed in: Ray, because he avoided water unless it was absolutely necessary, and Rogue, because she avoided stuff that involved getting technically naked around other people who were also technically naked. Also, she didn't see the point of the pool when the mansion's air conditioning worked perfectly fine. Kitty said something about how it was more fun, but Rogue stopped paying attention to her chatter after she started griping about her bathing suit.

But around noon, Logan dragged out the barbecue grill. Rogue couldn't help watching from her bedroom window. Stomach growling, she imagined fresh burgers and hot dogs and kabobs and…

Ah, what the hell.

She pulled on a light sweatshirt, sunglasses, and her regular sneakers, after a search for some flip-flops proved fruitless. The students splashing around in the pool hadn't noticed the grill yet, so she figured she'd head down right now, get first seat and first dibs.

She thought of inviting Ray too, for the sake of being polite. But when she walked by his room, he was sprawled out on his bed, earbuds jammed in and snoring. She let him be. She didn't know him all that well, though he and the other new recruits had been here for months now, but one thing she _did_ know was that the boy slept like a rock.

The heat hit Rogue like a physical blast when she stepped outside. It made her feel a sudden, nostalgic pang for Mississippi - but she brushed it off quickly. She hoped one of her housemates outside had sunblock.

She looked up as a voice called her name. "Hey, it's Rogue!"

Two of her fellow residents were out here on the front lawn. Bobby waved to her wildly. Sam waved like a normal person. Rogue almost couldn't believe what she was seeing.

"What," she said, walking over to them, "are you two doing?"

"Chilling," Bobby said. He grinned.

Rogue stared. "You look like a dork."

He _did_ look like a dork, wearing those sunglasses and that shit-eating grin and lounging in an inflatable pool. It was a kid-sized one, no more than five feet across with a goofy dragon's head poking up out of the rim. Bobby had his feet resting on it. Sam was stretched out in a similar one, except his legs were too long to comfortably fit. Instead, his feet rested in a smaller bin outside of the pool. Both pools and Sam's foot-bin were filled with water and an array of ice sculptures bobbing at the surface.

Rogue tried not to smile. "Both of you," she said, "look like huge dorks."

"Yeah, but we are comfy as hell," Bobby said, undeterred. He folded his hands behind his head and leaned all the way back.

"After Rahne and Jubilee finally came down, the big pool back there got way too crowded," Sam explained. "This is much more relaxing." He smiled.

"Y'all are ridiculous," Rogue said, without any real inflection. She'd hardly traded ten words with Sam Guthrie, but he seemed like a sweet boy, especially when he smiled. And Bobby - well, as irritating as Bobby was, you couldn't really hate him. And he knew specifically not to bother Rogue too much, so that was good enough for her.

She kicked Bobby's pool gently. "Where did you even get these?"

"Walmart," he answered.

"They were on sale," Sam added. "Three for the price of two. But we still had to blow two weeks' worth of allowance."

"Yeah, so we've got another one sitting in our room 'cause we forgot Ray's whole no-water-except-for-showering thing," said Bobby. Then suddenly, his eyes lit up. "Hey, Rogue, why don't you join us?"

If she was going to be honest, it wasn't a terrible idea. But Rogue scoffed.

"Not in a million years," she said good-naturedly.

**Fin**

* * *

Now that I've sort-of-accidentally written from an older X-Man/teacher's point of view twice, writing about their perceptions/relationships with the New Recruits doesn't sound like a horrible idea…

And speaking of ideas, that brings me to **Kind Of An Important Note:** I have realized I'm starting run out of creative steam for these fics! Aaah! It's horrible, because I enjoy writing them a lot. I have a few that I'm working on right now, but I've been drawing a blank on any new ideas. So! **If you like what I have written so far, and you have suggestions of your own, even if it's just "I'd like to see more of [this character]," it would be super awesome if you shared it with me in a review or a message!**

But please note that I am not doing actual _requests;_ I'm just fishing for inspiration anywhere I can find it. If your idea just doesn't work for me, I won't use it. And if I do use your idea, I'll write a kudos to you at the beginning of that story. But whether or not I use them, I will be infinitely grateful for _all_ suggestions!

Thanks for reading!


	9. Bet

it's been a while since I updated. School work & poor health have been kicking my ass these past few weeks, and I've just barely started dragging myself out of a creative block. But in spite of that, here is Chapter Nine!

* * *

**Bet**

The phone downstairs rang, making Jubilee jump and lose control of her go-kart. "Damn it," she muttered. "Damn it, damn it, damn it." She mashed the buttons on the controller frantically, but it was no use. She missed the turn. On the TV screen, Yoshi fell pitifully off the edge of Rainbow Road.

"You lost," said Ray.

"Oh, shut up," Jubilee snapped. She grabbed the last of his popcorn for herself.

The phone continued ringing shrilly. "Will somebody _please_ pick that up!" Jubilee yelled through the open door of the game room.

It rang once more, then Jamie's voice came from downstairs: "I got it! Hello?"

A moment later, they heard him call up again: "Roberto! It's for you!"

Jubilee perked up. She looked at Ray, who glanced back at her with a devious grin. She shut off the TV, and they both turned towards the door just as Roberto walked by, answering the second floor extension. "Hello? Oh, hey…"

By chance he looked over towards the game room and saw Ray and Jubilee staring at him expectantly. Wincing, he made a beeline for his bedroom.

"Ten bucks says it's Ruth," Ray wagered, hopping off the couch.

"No way, it's definitely Laura," Jubilee replied as she bounced out of the room.

It didn't take them long to catch up to Roberto. After all, they weren't the ones who had to try and sound normal to another person over the phone.

"Yeah, Kincaid's wraps are horrible," he was saying when they fell in pace with him. He glared at them and threw back his head, silently groaning, but of course no actual sound came out of his mouth. And when Ruth or Laura or whoever his girlfriend was this week said something, he responded, "I love Aldine's too!" in a completely normal tone.

Ray and Jubilee sniggered.

They were about three feet from his bedroom door when Roberto decided to make a mad dash for it, but Jubilee beat him there. She stood in the doorway with her hands planted on either side of the frame, making a human barricade. Roberto spun around - only to bump into Ray, who leaned in close to try and hear who he was talking to. Roberto shoved him away, all while talking about how the milkshakes at Aldine's were better than the ones at the mall.

"But I can't have too many milkshakes at all," he added.

Ray dodged Roberto's swatting arm and yelled, "Yeah, he's gettin' kinda chubby!" Jubilee guffawed loudly.

"Hold on a second." Roberto clamped his hand over the mouthpiece. _"Shut up!"_

"Kinda hit a _soft_ spot there, Ray," Jubilee cracked. Ray, of course, found that hilarious.

"Sorry," Roberto apologized to the phone. "It's my housemates. They don't know how to mind their own business and _not_ act like children - wait. What?" He blushed suddenly. "Oh no, I would _not_ be cute if I was - "

Ray howled with laughter and Jubilee doubled over trying to smother her own mirth. Roberto scowled deeply and, thinking they were properly distracted, walked as fast as he could towards the staircase. "Are you saying I'm not cute as I am now?" he asked. A hint of a smile was peeking out from his irritated expression.

"Oh _man,"_ said Jubilee.

"No one's cuter than you," Roberto was saying when they caught up to him at the end of the hall.

Ray mimed throwing up.

"I mean it!" Roberto insisted.

"It's totally Laura," said jubilee.

"No! He was constantly telling that to Ruth last time too!" Ray argued.

Whoever it was, she was saying a lot to Roberto. As he did a circuit around the first floor, trying in vain to dodge Ray and Jubilee, he mostly responded with "uh-huh" and "yeah."

"It's Ruth," Ray said. "She's probably telling him off very gently."

"He doesn't seem upset though," Jubilee replied.

"'Cause he doesn't realize it yet."

Roberto abruptly stopped. "I'd love to!" he said into the phone.

Jubilee nudged Ray in the arm excitedly, and they both waggled their eyebrows at Roberto. He tried to look annoyed, but he was clearly much too happy about whatever he'd just been asked, and it didn't work.

"It's not Ruth telling him off," Jubilee whispered to Ray, "It's Laura asking him out."

"Maybe Ruth's asking him out."

"No, _he_ always has to ask _her."_

They hushed as Roberto laughed at something. "Yeah, I guess I could have just _one_ milkshake with you."

"Oh my _god,"_ Jubilee exclaimed as Ray burst out laughing again. Roberto flipped them off.

"Okay. Okay. Sure," he said. "I'll see you on - I'll see you then," he amended quickly, casting a wary eye on his giggling housemates. "Alright. Bye!"

He hung up. But before he could start yelling at Jubilee and Ray, they crowded in on him.

"Who was that you were on the phone with, da Costa? huh?" Jubilee asked with a wicked smile. She poked him in the chest, and when he glared, she only laughed.

Ray was much more direct. "Ruth or Laura?" he demanded, lowering his head a little so he was uncomfortably close to Roberto. "Come on, I've got ten bucks riding on this."

"So don't bet on my - my personal life!" Roberto yelled.

"Oh, come _on,_ playboy. Just tell us," Jubilee wheedled. "I think it was _definitely_ Laura."

"Nah, Ruth," Ray argued.

Roberto stepped back, folded his arms across his chest. He said loftily, "It was Hisako."

"What!" Ray squawked.

Jubilee gaped like a fish. "Who the hell is Hisako?"

Roberto rolled his eyes. "I met her at the drugstore."

"Whoaaah!"

"What grade is she in?"

"Have we ever seen her?"

_"God,_ I hope not," Roberto snapped. "She goes to the Catholic school."

_"Oooooh,_ 'Berto's got himself a little Catholic school girl," Ray taunted. "Are you gonna corrupt her soul? Lead her astray?"

"I can't believe it," Jubilee said, punching Roberto on the arm. "Public school girls weren't good enough for you or something?"

"Nah, he just couldn't keep them," Ray cackled.

Roberto shot him a look. "At least I could _get_ them in the first place," he said.

Jubilee snickered. "Ohhhh! Burn…"

Thankfully, it only took five minutes to avoid a shouting match and a fistfight between the two of them. But then Roberto demanded they each give him five dollars, and Jubilee got ready to jump down his throat herself.

**Fin**

* * *

I hope this was alright. I feel like lately I haven't been coming up with great ideas for these - but I don't want to abandon it any time soon. The New Recruits are my babies… especially Ray, if you couldn't tell.

You guys should tell me which of the Newbs is your favorite and I'll write about them.


End file.
